I help couples understand the patterns that keep couples, addicted adult children, and the rest of their families stuck in the relapse/ guilt/ shame cycle.

What couples therapy with me will help you achieve:

You'll be able to get a full night's sleep without checking your phone or Life360.

Your addicted child will mention a problem and you won't immediately step in to fix it- because you know they need to start figuring things out for themselves to build confidence and feel the natural consequences of their actions (which helps motivate recovery).

You'll recognize it's possible to love your addicted adult child and hold hope that they can recover, while also responding rationally to their real-time behavior today.

Everyone around you will notice you seem calmer and ask how you did it. You'll become a role model for your partner, friends, and family (this may not come immediately but I promise, will happen in time).

How you’ll know couples therapy is working:

You’ll no longer just be identifying or setting boundaries- you'll actually be holding your boundaries with others.

You'll feel sad at times and uncomfortable others- but soon after or immediately (a week max), feel relieved, when you recognize some dangerous or incredibly overwhelming situations have been avoided.

You'll begin to think about your own goals, needs, hobbies and interests again (you might even realize what a mess your personal life has become, but you'll start to have the energy to do something about it, maybe for the first time in decades).

You'll start to divert the energy you put into fixing your AC's life into yourself, and they may even (shockingly!) be doing the same, with the energy they previously used to argue with you.

You’ll start encouraging them again, and being a consistent force of support in their life, instead of someone dragging them down (while they drag you down with them).

You'll have more patience with previously difficult relationships because you’ll simply develop more peace and subsequent “emotional bandwidth”.

You’ll finally feel confident that how you're handling this is the "right way", in your heart; no doubts anymore.

How we'll get you there:

We’ll discuss the ways your own family patterns have impacted the way you handle conflict and boundaries with your adult child, your partner, yourself, and the rest of your family.

We’ll identify where you’re overfunctioning, underfunctioning, or getting pulled into relationship triangles- and how to step out of those unhelpful and draining roles.

You’ll learn how to regulate your nervous system without relying on your child’s day-to-day behavior.

We’ll practice real-life boundary scenarios so you’re not figuring it out alone in the moment.

I’ll help you separate love from control- so your actions actually support change instead of unintentionally maintaining the cycle.

We’ll process the grief you’ve likely been avoiding- because unresolved grief is often what fuels overfunctioning, guilt, and control patterns.

You’ll build the capacity to stay emotionally present without collapsing, reacting, or shutting down.

We’ll focus on the concept of self-differentiation and strategies to build a stronger self- so you can stay connected to your child without losing yourself.

Important topics we’ll cover in-depth:

• Codependency

• Differing attachment styles

• Over-functioning/under-functioning relationship dynamics and tendencies

• Trauma bonding

• Generational childhood abuse/neglect

• Rigid family roles/responsibilities

It can be deeply frightening to experiment with showing up to disagreements or relapses differently.

You and your partner may fear if you do things differently, you’re abandoning your addicted adult child (called “Survivor’s Guilt”).

Therapy can help you finally let go of inappropriate guilt and shame.

Despite popular belief, research shows that if evenone person in the system changes, it naturally has an impact.

Therapy can also help you learn to side-step previously automatic patterns such as responding with irritability, anxiety, trauma, immaturity, or reactive behaviors, and respond from a place of calm, confidence, and vulnerability (read: real love).

I cultivate a warm therapeutic relationship to help you achieve meaningful, lasting change both within yourself and your relationships.

Regardless of whether others want to change, you can learn to feel comfortable doing what is healthy and sustainable for you.

As a micro-boutique practice, I offer personalized attention and care far beyond what larger clinics can provide. I provide highly specialized, in-depth support to a small caseload of clients on a weekly basis.